Wednesday, August 5, 2015

Equipment Files: The Reaper's Handbook, Part 1


As of this moment, the only thing separating you from an eternity of claiming the souls of the damned is the information in this very book, penned by none other than The Moirai, The Three Fates who govern Destiny. Within its pages, you’ll find the secrets of life’s beginnings and ends, the mechanisms that keep the great clock of the world ticking, and wisdom coveted by even the Gods themselves. When your knowledge is such that you yourself have become Death, open this book to its ultimate chapter, and perform the ritual detailed therein. Upon its completion, you will find yourself at the gaping maw of Hades*. Confidently stride through the queue of the deceased, heedless of the slavering Cerberus, and present this handbook to Charon. Begrudge though he may, he will ask for no coin as he charters you a course over the River Styx, across the River Acheron, towards your new home. But be warned, former mortal. Your career as a Reaper can only be born when your mind is pregnant with the seed of knowledge in these covers. Any attempts to reach The Underworld without having read every last page of this book will bear no fruit. For as you read this book, it too, is reading you. Your knowledge and ignorance are laid bare before it. If you are found wanting, you may just find yourself in a part of The Underworld that you do not wish to visit.


*In this context, Hades refers to The Underworld itself, rather than the King who rather unfortunately bears its name. In an effort to minimize this lamentable ambiguity, this Handbook will use “Hades” only when referring to the deity. The realm over which he rules will simply be referred to as “The Underworld”. Regrettably, this naming convention is all too common among the divine, who arrogantly posit that the petty ego boost of naming their domain after themselves is worth sullying the elegance of Fate’s decrees. In general, names that can refer to a being or location will refer to the former, unless otherwise specified, exemplī grātiā “The River Styx”.

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